Unreconciled...or Irreconciled?

I've always heard people say irreconciled differences, not unreconciled, right?

Anyway, I should be studying for my GRE's which is happening on October 3 of this year. I've pushed it back long enough so it's time to just stick with the plan. I feel a bit unmotivated. I've done a lot today as far as running errands and stuff. I seem to be regressing. I was doing pretty well with not letting uncontrollable things control me, but it's beginning to strike up again. I guess when you have too much time to think, you end up thinking about things that bring you down.

I must admit that I've been feeling pretty lonely lately. I've been feeling like everyone around me has disappeared. These times make me really miss the times when my dad was still here. I can just give him a hug and at least for that moment, my troubles would just melt away. At least for that moment, I would feel safe and loved. It's really quite interesting how lately...I would find myself feeling emotional and I would tear up without something to stimulate it. I'm usually an emotional person so when I watch something sad or even happy, I tend to cry. Excuse my corny attempt at describing this but lately I feel like my heart is doing a lot of crying but my mind doesn't quite understand why.

I am blessed with so much but I feel like all of these blessings are an inch away from my reach.

I want to do so much but I find myself not being able to move. I want to talk but I feel so tired to speak.

What am I really running away from?


I miss you.