So, I woke up at 8 today even though I don't remember exactly when I fell asleep. I got home at around 12 last night. PCN was alright this year. The dances were good, but the skit was really annoying me, especially towards the end. I was also not feeling very well. I dunno why, but it's like I wanted to throw up but there wasn't anything in my tummy for me to throw up. Weird.
Anyway, so I got up and the first thing I did was get started on my laundry. While my clothes were in the washer, I swept the floor...I hate dirty floors. When I was done with that, I put my clothes into the dryer and decided to make some chicken noodle soup. I was gonna make it for my mom last time but I didn't manage my time very well.
So I made, Chicken noodle soup....I wonder if it's good. I ate it, but to me it's ok. I hope my mom will like it. I made a vegan noodle soup for my grandma too. It's hard making vegan food, cus everything's vegetarian. Doesn't taste the same, you know? Anyway, so when I finished that. I took a quick shower cus I had to pick up my grandma from work and take her to her English class. After I dropped her off at her class, I went to get an oil change. I was glad that didn't take very long. So I came back a lil early so I waited for grandma outside, and wanted to be productive. So, I took out my music for an event I'm singing for with some LOG people and practiced the tagalog songs. Not to be cocky, but I think I'm pretty good at this whole tagalog thing. heh. I was singing one of the songs, and a Vietnamese man walked by. That was awkward cus he sorta looked at me weird.
oh wait, I forgot to mention that when my clothes were dry, I folded them, because my brother went into the bathroom without asking me if I was using it, because clearly, my clothes were in there and I was just waiting for my pants to dry! sigh. inconsiderate should be his middle name.
Let's not get into that. So then, after I picked up my grandma, I took her back to her work place and went home. I wanted to record something today, but my piano skills, or lack of..skills...got in the way. So, as soon as I get that down, I'll record it.
I dunno what to do now. I mean, there are so many things I can do. I can study. I can go run. I can keep on practicing piano. I can clean some more.
I dunno. My head feels heavy. I had a not so good drive home yesterday. You know when you're crying and the tears make everything blurry...yea, that's not good when you're driving. When I came home, I went to see my dad. The feeling that I got the day he left, is the same feeling I have every night and day. I remember when I was crying in bed, and some friends were there with me. My grama was in her room crying with people there, and my mom, in her room. It was definitely a cry that I've never experienced before. It was hurting...still hurts. I was crying tears, and crying out...After each session, I would feel my head as heavy as it is right now and my eyes barely having the strength to open.
I feel so discouraged. Sometimes I feel like I'm being pushed down so hard, that I don't even wanna deal with it anymore. I don't wanna play the victim either. I know when I'm wrong. I just wish people would hear me out more, instead of being so caught up in their own defenses.
blah. Time to get busy with something so this last 8 hours can go by quicker.
to be continued...
So, all I can think about right now is you. Why do I get so nervous and anxious at the thought of you?
My head hurts. I'm gonna sleep.
good night world.
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